Malam ini... 

Ku harap ini malam yang terakhir

Tuk menyisipkan butiran air

Disela detik yang akan berakhir

Bak sebuah manisan

Yang suatu saat akan hilang

Lalu begitu saja ditinggalkan

Tanpa ada rasa bimbang

Jangan lagi kau tanya mengapa

Aku, terlanjur sudah kecewa

Terimakasih atas segala tawa

Terimakasih atas segala luka

Aku tak apa...

Tapi jangan kau tanya mengapa

Lewat malam ini saja,

Kan ku selipkan rindu yang tak bermuara

Now 13:45 pm. There's me and laptop. I'm still stuck on it. Accidentaly, i open the "dust" folder. Re-read. Re-read the old memory. Little conversation. I'm smile. But on the other hand... I just wanted to take a deep breath. March, 23th. This afternoon.With cloudy. It seems knows. It's 47 days already. And i haven't lost it all. Through this cloud. This cloud. Please tell someone over there, cloud.

I feel it's like,

"The most uncomfortable atmosphere. Can i skip this part for a while?"

That words can describe how i feel now. Really messed.

Btw, Assalamualaikum March! And today is march already. Not feeling bad but not feeling well too. Im tired, im sad, im happy, i want to shout, i want to free, i want to cry, i want to laugh, i dont know why i am. Yes, tired. But just let it flow. Im sure this is a process, process for a better. Im still stand up! Bcs i believe that Allah always support me.

Dan ketika telah datang "kesudahan" itu

Lisan pun tak kuasa berkata tidak

Hanya tetes air itu yang bercerita

Rasa ingin bangun dari semua mimpi

Ketakutanku tak lagi sebuah wacana

Karena kepastian yang menetapkan

Akhirnya gantung pergi melambai

Meninggalkan sebuah bekas

Bekas itu masih terngiang

Dan akan selalu terkenang

Ingin sekali berkata,

Tujuh belas ini masih istimewa...

Assalamualaikum

Too long no post in here.  And i started this post with a poem in indonesia language. Yaaa! That's describes my feelings. Okay i guess, i don't need to talk much in here. The point is, now im studying to be a sincere girl :)

Masih menunggu sebuah kotak kecil menyala terang...
Diam... Tak berbuat
Dimana senyuman yg dirindukan?
Yang berlalu tetap diharap
Esok ternyata tak bisa
Apalagi esoknya?


Dan tiada terang lagi
Padahal menanti sebuah kalimat penyejuk
Butiran air tak tertahan
Saat tahu lisan itu berkata
Yang tak sesuai tak usalah disimpan
Bukan ku tak ingin percaya
Tapi karna terlanjur sudah
Semua, sebab ku ingin berkelanjutan

Assalamualaikum.

Hm, tonight i just spent my time with reading some books. Absolutely not books of lesson :]

Actually my feeling isn't so good like one or two hours ago, because........ Yes, something that i want to forget come again. Not to say 'helo' but just want to make me yrc. Thanksss!

As usually, when im not in a good mood i prever tell it all to Allah or reading some books than listen to music. Bcs i think listen music will make my tears come out more and more. So i prever it.

After i read, i found...

"Because the real victory will come along with patience. 'The end of problems' will come along with difficulty. And, every difficulty there will ease."

The point is, just waiting for happy ending :]

Just that's all. Thanks for reading & wassalam.

When you feel messed up. When you want to let go of everything you feel. When you want to express everything you feel. When you want someone to hear your feeling. When you want an attention. When you want to be understood. However, you don't know who would do it all for you. If you feel that nothing will be doing it all for you... You're wrong! Did you realize Allah is always there beside you? Did you realize Allah always give you an attention? Did you realize Allah will do anything for you? Allah never left us to sad . And I'm sure of it. I'm sure Allah always heard my prayers. I'm sure Allah has done a variety of ways to cheer me up. I'm sure Allah will not leave me alone. Because Allah is my faithful listeners :')